So, if you’re sitting and stewing on the Liverpool bench, and the chance of a lifetime comes along, what do you do

If you’re Jermaine Pennant, it’s ask for too much money and mess everything up. According to the Daily Mail, Real Madrid (yes, that Real Madrid, the one with nine Champions League titles and a whole bunch of money to blow on the world’s best players) made a £3.5m offer to Liverpool for Pennant.

And instead of accepting Real Madrid’s salary offer of £30k a week, Pennant asked for £60k a week, which saw Real end their delusions and break off the deal. Now, instead of getting to live it up in Madrid, he might be set for Stoke or Wigan, though Celtic have also been recently linked with him.

Wait, what As hard as it is to believe that Real have any interest in Pennant, it’s even harder to believe that he’d have the audacity to ask for £60k a week when he’s not even earning his keep at Anfield right now.

If this is all true, he really must be hitting that bottle of Jack pretty hard then…